Do your homework everyday, Keep those D's and F's away.

I remember mrs. chu would always say this in class. and everytime she said that i thought to myself... stfu mrs. chu, you dont know what your talking about.But now that i think about it.. she was right. I really understood what she was talking about last year. Never did my homework, never studied, never did anything. just slept at home and wasted the day away. i was looking through my old xanga, and i came across this post

Friday, June 06, 2008

Summer this year was sort of a bust. C+ in chem, which is pretty sad. should of payed attention in class. lots to look forward to this summer. hang with friends, lee's, camp agape, lots and lots of summer work for eng 3H, summer work for krn 3H, summer school, and more to come. not really looking forward to my junior year. gotta step up my game and stop playing after summer. whatever i get next year decides which college ill be going to. UCLA and those other crazy schools are out of my league. for now.. i want to go to UCI. anyways, im going to try and stay away from those type of thoughts for now. hopefully ill be able to go out every day this and next week before summer school. in about 2 months i think im moving to corona. looking forward to it because its a new house, new place, sounds interesting. not looking forward to it because its too far from everything. takes 30 min to get to school without traffic, 34 min to church. going to feel isolated there. and the neighborhood smells because its sorta on the border of corona and chino... thats it for now. getting tired and i have to wake up early so i can go to some park for a 80's themed picnic...

Thats what i wanted to do for my junior year. but becuase i was so lazy and stupid i failed miserably. My goal for college was UCI. Now i'd be lucky to get into cal poly or CSF. i duno what i was thinking last year. i dont even know what im thinking this year. im already going back to my junior routine. nap, tv, computer, eat. thats all i did last year. and honestly i really regret that. if i at least just did my hw. not even study. just do my hw. i would probably still have a chance at UCI. but now.. fuck. today i was thinking about everything thats been going on, and my past decisions. And now that i really think about it, 90% of the stuff i've done in the last 1.. maybe 2 years have been stupid decisions. and over half of them i cant even fix, or its really hard to fix. i kind of understand why my moms so strict with me. kinda.. she just wants me to have a good life when i grow up. I know my moms not as strict as some parents. i get to go out occasionally and chill with friends. but honestly, i think if i was totally free i'd be doing better in school. i know its a stupid mentality, but when my mom doesnt let me go out, or... yea doesnt let me go out. i go into a i dont want to do anything productive anymore mode. where i feel like im getting back at my mom for not letting me go out by doing absolutely nothing productive. and i know it sounds immature.. but yea. but now that i think about it.. wow. im stupid.
conclusion. this year im going to really try in school. and if i end up straying away, hopefully i can glance back at this blog and straighten myself out. the whole reason for this blog is for me to remember what i need to do. anyways, i just blanked out and forgot what else i was going to write.
side note. moving to corona is still a possibility. we already have the house there, just dont know if we're going to move in or not. but i think moving to corona might be better for me. i'd be able to concentrate more on school. might get a car. and maybe i'd even be able to sleep over more... -_-x